30 Years Old

I've entered my 4th decade and it feels good! My 29th year was one to remember and I think this coming one will be even more special! The biggest highlights of the year include: 1. Major progress in our adoption, most importantly, knowing who our son would be: Wedley Etienne Stuart. 2. The blessing of our pregnancy! I can't believe I'm 29 weeks along, praise God!! 3. Completing our home and moving in! 4. Dan's new job, that so far he's really enjoying! 5. My new baby nephew, Levi. Such a sweet little guy. It's going to be fun to watch him grow.

God has blessed me so much, sometimes I get overwhelmed by all that he has given me. Things I'm grateful for (many repeats from the above list): #1. My husband. He is such a blessing to me and I can't imagine walking through life without him. #2 My sweet little Wedley. Just today I was looking at some pictures that were taken just after he came to COTP. I can't look at them too long b/c they make me sad...I just wish I could hold, hug and love on that little baby. He's not a baby anymore. And I can't wait to bring that little toddler home to make up for lost time. #3. My other sweet little boy growing in my tummy. The best part of my days are the moments that I get to sit down and watch my stomach jump around from his movements. I can't wait to meet the little guy, but I think there will be a small part of me that will miss having him jumping around inside me. I seriously LOVE feeling him. #4. My parents, brother and sister. Again, what did I do to deserve them? The answer is absolutely nothing, but they are a gift from God that I love with all my heart. They are my family and more importantly, they are my friends and are such a big support for me. #5. Friends. I have so many friends and this year I've been overwhelmed by the love and support of them all. They've helped work on our home, been so excited for us with our adoption and our pregnancy and just in general I've felt very, very loved. #6. My church. A church that aims to love Jesus and follow his leading. Pretty good stuff. #7. I'm thankful for my home. The past couple of years have been so crazy busy building our home, it's so nice to just be settled. I love how cozy it is in here. I love how we've made it ours. I could make a pretty long list of all that I'm thankful for, but it's getting late, so I best call it a night.

Contractions and a time of rest.

Well, as mentioned previously, I've been having lots of contractions. I think we've decided that this is probably just what my body is going to do. Still, I've been really trying to take it easy here at home. Though I'd give anything for these contractions to go away, simply for the peace of mind that he'll be cooking for many weeks to come, I've been trying to enjoy these weeks of quiet before things get really crazy around here. I've been so very thankful for my husband and my home. Dan has been so supportive through it all and I loved the extra time to read my adoption and family books while sitting in front of our wood stove. And one thing I've certainly learned over the years (this past year in particular), It's that God's timing is always perfect. This baby won't arrive until he has ordained it, just like his conception didn't come until God said the timing was right and just like I know that Wedley will come at just the right time.

God has been so faithful to me and I love looking back at how it's all been orchestrated. While things haven't gone as I would have planned, I'm so grateful that it was HIS plan that came about and not mine. I'm so very thankful that Wedley will be joining our family and I know he wouldn't be, had we been able to have children right away. I'm thankful that we were able to build our house prior to our kids joining us. I just don't think we could have done it otherwise. I'm in awe over the miracle baby that I get to feel wiggle inside of me every day. And I'm really, really, really grateful for these brief few months between our home being completed and our boys joining our lives for Dan and I to focus on our marriage. It's been wonderful having some laid back time to read together, watch movies together, play games together, go on walks and just to build our partnership. My life has been a story of God's faithfulness to his children. May the glory be His!

A good week.

This has turned out to be a particularly good week so far. We had the fabulous news on Monday that within a week or two, Wedley's paperwork should be basically completed and all that will be left is for him to get his passport and visa! Stepanie, our adoption coordinator, estimates that should be done between the end of March and end of April. Course, it's Haiti and thus anything can happen, but still...there's a chance he could be home within a month and a half! I'm ecstatic!! This just lights a fire under my britches to get some stuff done...in particular his room. Dan's been working on a bed for him and I went in on Monday to look at fabric for my mother-in-law to make a quilt. I think I like what I got!

As for pregnancy news, at about 22 (I'm now almost 25) weeks I started having some contractions. Just a few here and there, nothing I should really be concerned about, though they did catch me off guard. Then at 23 weeks, they really started picking up. They told me to go into the FBC if I got more than 5 in an hour, so I did. They were actually coming every 2 minutes. Yikes! My cervix was all closed up, though, so they sent me home and told me to come in if this started happening again. Two nights later, same thing happened, so I went in. Again, they were about 2 minutes apart. Well, I didn't want to be coming in every day or two, so they told me to come in if there was any change in how they felt (pain, bleeding, etc). I've continued to have contractions, but since they haven't changed, have tried to not worry about it (and really, I'm getting more used to the idea of them). Today I had an ultrasound to measure my cervix and thus I got to see my baby too (much more exciting than seeing my cervix, let me tell you!). He looked absolutely beautiful. I just love that little guy. And the best part was that everything looks just fine with my cervix (it's not shortening significantly, so it looks like the contractions are at this point completely harmless). This makes me very happy. Still, because of the contractions, I will be taking a few weeks off from work until I get to 28 weeks gestation. So, even though it feels like I've got a lot to do to get ready for our boys, I will be taking things very slow until numero dos is a little more cooked.

Big Life update

Sheesh...I guess I forgot about this blog. So much has happened in life since I last posted. BIG things! We've moved into our house (YIPEE!!) and most importantly are expecting our second little boy! I should just tell the story. Back in September, we were wrapping up some last minute details on the house and getting ready to head to Haiti to meet our son, Wedley, when I noticed that I was feeling a little strange. The main thing I noticed was that I was literally having to run to the restroom at least every hour (I'm the girl who, if it's busy enough, can go an entire 12 hour shift at work without going to the bathroom. I know...bad girl!). Hmm...I thought something is up and it doesn't feel like an infection. Well, i've taken pregnancy tests before and only ended up disappointed, but shoot, I decided to run to the dollar store anyway. So, the next morning, before jumping in the shower out at our property, I took the test. Left the room for a few minutes and came back to see one dark pink stripe and a much lighter, but still present, second pink stripe. "What? You've got to be KIDING me!" I said to myself over and over again. I laughed and cried and praised the Lord. And because I wondered if you could really trust a pregnancy test that costs $1, I ran to the store and bought a digital, fool-proof one and tried again. Sure enough it said the glorious word "pregnant." I couldn't believe it. Just absolutely couldn't believe. So, that evening (not sure what exactly we had going that night, just that we were doing something and didn't really have a chance to ourselves until we fell into bed that evening), I pulled out the pregnancy test and handed it to Danno. It was really dark in the room and he had absolutely no clue what it was. I finally had to go turn on a brighter light so that he could have a good look at it. I think he said something like "What??? Really???" And of course we hugged and kissed and stared at each other in disbelief...and then said over and over again, let's not get our hopes up. And of course, we had to keep that in mind for months and months. We still do. But there was a glimmer of hope that maybe, just maybe, this time it would stick. It's funny, though...since I've experienced a few losses, I was pretty careful not to get too incredibly attached at first. I know it sounds awful, but I just couldn't let my heart go there. I only told a few people, we didn't take any pictures for a long time, and I really didn't do any journaling about it. It's just taken a long time to come to the point where I can let myself dream that this baby might someday smile at me, call me mommy, and that I might come to know his personality. And now here we are in February and I'm 6 months pregnant. It's been amazing and scary at times (I'll try to post more on some of the details in another post). Mostly, we are just in awe of what God has done and is doing in our lives. We yearn for the day when we can hold both of our boys in our arms and under our roof.

House update

We've continued to plug away at the house. It's been a LONG process and has taken up the majority of our time, but it's really coming together. We hope to be in by the end of summer! Hip Hip Hooray!!! We've recently finished the exterior rock work, are wrapping up tile, continue to plug away at millwork and are just about to start our hardwood floors! Here are a few pictures...

A Disciple.

This is a post, I've been wanting to write for quite awhile now...something I've been contemplating on recently. Not too long ago, I finished reading through the book of Acts. As I read through it fairly quickly, the thing that really stuck out to me was just the overall picture of how much craziness the apostles went through in order to share the word of the Lord. It would seem that all things were stacked against them and yet, the gospel spread like wildfire. And the apostles were willing to go through literally ANYTHING in order to share the message of Christ's love. It was their highest priority. It would seem that nothing else really mattered. Having just read through the all the gospels one right after the other, followed by Acts, I came to know the discples a bit better. Also, I'm doing a Beth Moore study called "The Beloved Discple," which of course, follows the life of John (and thus, some of the other discples as well). Anyway, as I read through Acts, the thought just kept coming to me that the apostles went through a TON of anguish and hardships in keeping the gospel. They treated it as a treasure. And here I too carry this good news message, yet I don't act as though the mission of sending it out is that important. If I were to cross paths with Peter, I would feel so embarrassed because I've done such a poor job of carrying on the job that they started. I'd like to think I'd go to prison for the gospel...I'd face all kinds of threats and yes, even be willing to die for the gospel. And yet, here I sit with peoeple all around me who need God's grace to cover them. The least I could do is share the message with them. Instead I continue on in the business of my life. God, forgive me!

Gravestones

Pretty morbid title, but I recently started reading a book that talked about living your life like you want to be remembered. I'm afraid I don't do a very good job at that. I tend to get caught up in the moment, doing what I want to do for the time being. I don't think I'm very far-sighted. What do I want to be remembered for in a few words? I want people to know (based on my actions) that I loved my God wholeheartedly. I want them to know I loved my family to the best of my abilities. And I want to be known as a compassionate person...one who served others, no matter what they look like, what they wear, what they smell like, and what their past or future looks like. I wish I did a better job at being bold...to seize the moment and do unusual things, like taking a homeless person I come across out to lunch. Things like that. There are a lot of things that I enjoy and aspire to. For example, I'd love to get more education. I'd love to be known as an adventurer, a world traveler, a mountain climber, an avid reader. These are things I have spent some time on. But those things aren't what I want written on my gravestone. I want something far simpler, yet much harder to obtain. I want to be known for my love of others. I want to live my life purposefully. Who doesn't? But it's rare to come across someone who actually does.